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Listen to Both Your Smart Heart and Head

September 20, 2021 - Reading time: 2 minutes

Communication rules in healthy happy relationships. There is an increasingly widespread idea that the important thing for people to keep in mind when entering a union our their feelings as well as the feelings of their partner. These can often get lost in the hubbub. According to this idea, our feelings should be the compass that guide the relationships between two people, influence them when making decisions, decide what is right or wrong, define the aspects of their relationship that they want to develop.

It's been often put aside in favor of one's will and intelligence, today it is seen as one of three important factors, which is also the key element in the relationship because it was common belief that it's going to be the easiest sense of reason to follow. This is seen a lot at work especially when we "feel tired" (feelings/emotions are exhausting to handle at times) we don't finish our job well, rather than being strong and doing it right.

This makes sense.

Therefore it also makes sense that the same be applied to the principle of marriage, this would work so long as we are clear about our feelings, so rather than when you stop "feeling" love for the spouse, the marriage loses its meaning. Taken from this perspective it is no wonder that it is increasingly widespread phenomena. That is to say when feelings begin to disappear a couple's coexistence is made into an uphill battle. Situations like these ultimately begin to force many people to start looking outside for what they do not find inside. Instead of focusing their attention and effort on regaining or rebuilding that love, they get carried away with what they feel is the easiest solution: feeling like victims and seeking comfort elsewhere.

The notion that something so fundamental and natural affects such intimate aspects of people -- as love cannot be based exclusively on something as fragile and brittle as feelings -- that by their very nature are oscillating and subject to ups and downs that. In fact in most cases they do not merely depend on the will of oneself. As most well know feelings depend on many factors, both of which are internal and external to oneself. Factors such as climatology, tiredness, hormonal disarrays, stress, etc... make our feelings and moods vary greatly. Marriage must be entrenched and built on something more solid like than emotion, but it cannot survived with will and intelligence alone. It must be guided by the heart and head, which makes an intelligent love, a lasting bond.

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Staying Connected in Times Like These

July 3, 2020 - Reading time: 3 minutes

One of the most rewarding activities is having a good time with friends. Now with one restriction after another appearing through the coronavirus pandemic, this once simple task has become a challenge. And in times like these the the benefits are in drastic need. Spending time with friends serves not only to relax and help us, but rather to support and help them. This is the reason I have network of contacts.

It's important to grow your networking whenever you can and with network I mean actual physical people, not social media friends! These are all types of people, you need to think about the relationships you want to have tomorrow and start building them today. This goes for the business side of things of course, people prefer to do business with their friends. According to my high school career counseling, nine out of ten jobs are achieved by such contacts. And I can attest to this, my fiancée got his job out of college through the father of his best friend.

Here are some tips how to take advantage of our personal relationships:

Make a list of the 250 people most important to you: business leaders, community leaders, friends, and family. This can be anybody really. The list should contain anyone we can offer something to or who can help us or who we can help. Start cultivating these relationships. I am not just talking about calling people by phone. Create long-term relationships that are lasting. It is important to remember the birthday or hobbies of our friends and contacts. Remembering somebody on their birthday is a nice gesture and it is easy to reach out to them.

Identify your attributes and improve them. Determine what you can offer others instead of only seeking people out for what they can offer you. The more we can offer the more interested people will be in helping us.

Analyze events well that pertain to your social circle. This is important because in order for us to be accepted by our contacts, we must be aware of news, events, and among other things changes in the way things are done. In addition to providing you with information, this will give you material to start conversations in any situation.

Always treat everyone at the same level.

Nothing scares people away more than a negative person. Always be optimistic, think positive and show it in your conversations. Listen, however, and let others speak. Don't talk without knowing what is being discussed.

Create a good impression from the start. It is helpful to move to the introduction stage quickly. Talk about hobbies, children, health, or other topics that will put people at ease.

The people that have complained the most about the lockdowns that are going on were the people without many contacts to start with. Don't let yourself get shut in.